November 17, 2016

Overt or Covert Body Shaming - Same Result {An Open Letter}

Why do we feel like we have to put others down in order to build ourselves up? Why can't we realize that we are all different, that that's a good thing, and actually live by it too?

No, we won't all look the same. But body shaming people you perceive as being prettier or more ideally shaped than you, or as having easier hair (which is rarely the case) than you, when that may not be how they see it- or you- isn't going to help. That only spreads negativity. And it's not helpful to anyone, including and especially the person out of whose mouth such words come. Personally, I think most people have some aspect of physical beauty about them, just as much as they have flaws.

Mostly, I perceive their beauty or lack thereof as being due to their attitude and character.

I know I'm not perfect. I have good days and bad days, just like anyone else. I know that I am learning to love myself, truly and fully for who I am, including or in spite of my imperfections. I'm not angry at you for evidencing your bitterness. Honestly, my biggest reaction is to feel sorry for you. Because you are too busy comparing yourself to others, instead of appreciating and valuing and loving yourself, and therefore being able to truly outpour love to those around you.

I've been there, and I know what that feels like. It's tough. But I also know you can't stay there to get better. And that it also takes work to get up. And a lot of people are fine being miserable and hateful and wallowing in their own self pity, because they don't really want to make the effort to work from the inside out. They'd really rather someone else do it for them. And that's not going to happen.

I sincerely hope that you find it in you to love yourself the way you are. And can spread that love to others, instead of criticizing your perception that may or may not be reality. 

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